Introduction to Edenism

You may have heard that a bunch of weirdos on the internet think they’re neanderthals. This is partially true and partially false. Consider this photo.

Is this baby Caucasian or black? Clearly it is an edge case that requires a clear definition of race, because the recessive genes for red hair disrupt the melanin production that produces the pigmented skin associated with people of African ancestry. Using the forensic anthropology definition of ancestry, we would classify this baby as black due to skeletal features which are predominant in African populations. It would not be a contradiction in terms to describe this child as a white-skinned negroid, but to do so assumes a familiarity with statistical distributions beyond what may be expected of most audiences.

The grand, unifying thesis of Edenism is a straightforward conclusion drawn from established scientific premises. Despite this, it is highly controversial because it is entangled in highly politicized topics like psychology, race, sociology, myth, and morality for which homo sapiens man has evolved a complex of simple emotional heuristics that together constitute what is called “common sense”. Without further ado, here is the big idea:

Ancestry may be described statistically by skeletal features, which correlate strongly with the genetics of breeding populations. Different human populations have different statistical distributions for personality, intelligence, and so on which can be broadly characterized by ancestry. There exist humans today with inherited skeletal traits and genetics which are both characteristic of extinct subspecies, and these people also exhibit a stereotyped distribution of psychological traits. Perhaps most notable is a distinct lack of the aforementioned “common sense” and concomitant affinity for analytical system building, an observation that has supported ten seasons of the comedy show The Big Bang Theory as of this writing.

I describe myself as a neanderthal as shorthand for the more complicated statistical realities of breeding populations, ancestry, and inheritance of skeletal features. It is more true to describe myself as a neanderthal rather than as a homo sapiens, but not categorically true. There is a running gag in this community which parodies the idea of applying binary thinking to paleolithic racial identity—if one of us tells you they are a “TROO THAL” they are being facetious. Here is a visualization of the more complex reality.



The first skull belonged to a neanderthal and displays many archaic  traits: a heavy brow ridge, a prominent occipital bun, and a short cranial vault. The second skull belonged to a Cro Magnon, the genetic hybrid of homo sapiens and neanderthals and the successors of neanderthals in Europe. Although it has some modern features like a heightened cranium and reduced brow ridge, and some features inherited from homo sapiens, there are clearly features inherited from neanderthals such as the retention of a prominent occipital bun.

Here’s a redacted picture of me which shows a continuation of these trends.


We can see the trends from neanderthal to Cro Magnon continue: the brow ridge is reduced, the cranium is taller, and the prominent occipital bun remains. It would be most precise to describe myself as a Cro Magnon descendent with significant psychological markers inherited from neanderthals, which I’ll discuss later when I summarize the personality research of an amateur Finnish scientist who goes by Rdos.

The fact of the matter is that neanderthals per se are extinct*. But many of us carry genes from neanderthals, some of which have very strong phenotypal expression (like those for red hair). DRD4-7r is the poster child for this phenomenon in genetic psychology—this one little variation on a single gene has significant effects on personality, cognition, and life outcomes.


*Possible exceptions are not worth including in these broad, sweeping terms. Almas in Russia, for instance, may be proper neanderthal remnants.

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Oh, the humanity

As support for one of my odder psychological theories, that increasing globalism is the expression of mass narcissism, I appeal to the authority of Fyodor Dostoevsky:

“It’s just the same story as a doctor once told me,” observed the elder. “He was a man getting on in years, and undoubtedly clever. He spoke as frankly as you, though in jest, in bitter jest. ‘I love humanity,’ he said, ‘but I wonder at myself. The more I love humanity in general, the less I love man in particular. In my dreams,’ he said, ‘I have often come to making enthusiastic schemes for the service of humanity, and perhaps I might actually have faced crucifixion if it had been suddenly necessary; and yet I am incapable of living in the same room with any one for two days together, as I know by experience. As soon as any one is near me, his personality disturbs my self-complacency and restricts my freedom. In twenty-four hours I begin to hate the best of men: one because he’s too long over his dinner; another because he has a cold and keeps on blowing his nose. I become hostile to people the moment they come close to me. But it has always happened that the more I detest men individually the more ardent becomes my love for humanity.'”

The Brothers Karamazov

This explains the oft-observed tendency of conservatives and classicists to be politically cynical and interpersonally agreeable, and vice versa for liberals and egalitarians. You don’t want to be roommates with someone who is optimistic about “humanity”, understood as a giant abstraction standing in for a bunch of individuals, anymore than a woman wants to be with a guy who worships the divine feminine. That’s because men who actually love IRL women, spend time with them, and know how to make them happy know that women are made of warts just like the rest of us.

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Regarding purged comment trees

I’ve just deleted about 450 comments by swog, at his request. Swog, if you’re reading this please note that I’ve probably missed a bunch because your initials are useless for running a search (searching for them just returns almost all comments), and it’s basically impossible to track down all the e-mail addresses you’ve used. (Funny enough, I was able to catch a couple more by searching for “Roger Stone”.)

I’m not sure what it is about melon-backs that requires burning down one house before moving into the next house, but along with Koanic and Lazer three’s a pattern. Anyway, the reason this may matter to the rest of you is that replies to these comments often unfortunately get caught up in the deletion. There’s no good way to avoid this, to my knowledge. If you lost an effortpost and you want it back, please let me know and I’ll look through the archive I’ve made.

If you have any effortposts in response to Lazer/Akuma you may want to save them because he’s previously asked me to delete everything twice and he may ask again in the near future. Sorry about the trouble. I don’t always understand it, but I try always to deal with it in the way that seems best.

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Compiled tech career advice from comments

Roughly in order. All content plagiarized with no apologies, because that’s how we do it on the streetz. Generally drawn from these comments though:

The Manichean dialectic

First, begin to absorb the general ethos of these fellas (watch a couple of videos per day for low-impact fun and profit):

Also read Hacker News daily, as it’s a good way to pick up general tech lingo and developments in the tech world. Succeeding as a contract coder is also part political and you need to understand the pond you’re swimming in.

Read this book boildown to learn how to learn, and apply it to the critical path to getting paid CASH MONEY:

  1. 12-week coding bootcamp [Ed: not viable for me at the moment, will self-teach]
  2. Create a website and blog about programming
  3. Write some simple apps, put them in the app store if possible
  4. Specialize in something and go deep
  5. Go to as many IRL geek meetups in your area as possible and network

Apply Scott Adams’ talent stack thinking to IT [Ed: but still go deep?] JS + AI + data science == superstimulus to the recruiting officer’s brain, so they will overlook juniority. [Ed: This won’t work for everybody but it’s good advice for me, I have the math background to pull that off.]

You can get a job working purely as a front end developer and those skills are highly in demand. Learn the following, in order of career significance (i.e. go deep on Javascript):

  1. Javascript (ES6 standard)
  2. AngularJS/ReactJS (the main Javascript framework these days)
  4. Jquery
  5. One backend language (for ease, try NodeJS which is Javascript on the server, otherwise go with PHP or Java)
  6. Linux

For 1 and 3, at least, do FreeCodeCamp. Read the book/pdfs “Javascript: the good parts” by Crockford and “Eloquent Javascript” to go deep on that subject. Get a VPS and play with it to learn Linux backend, or at least run a virtual server. [Ed: dual-boot and play with the shell and shell programming to get used to that, maybe do Linux from Scratch to go deep on that one. Dunno about AngularJS or Jquery.] Learn the Linux file structure, the permission system and such things as systemd daemons. Also try use the terminal as much as possible and learn vi. The terminal is immensely powerful and used by most serious unix-like developers. Maybe combine all of these and run the blog on a VPS, advertising one’s resume and apps?

Avoid C, C++, PHP, and Java, and the Unix suite except as hobbies or sexual masochism.

This is basically the landscape of JS frameworks right now: Angular 1 is the king and has been for about 3 years. Backbone, Knockout, Ember are some older contenders that are still popular. React is an up and comer that is taking market share from Angular. It doesn’t provide as much structure so you basically have to learn another add-on framework (Redux, Reflux, etc). Angular 2 is on the horizon, but hasn’t really gained traction yet. Aurelia is like Angular 3 but not widely used. Learn Angular or React. The latter is more popular in the US than here, so should be fine.

Conceptually, learn basic algorithms (quick sort, binary sort, recursive search) and data structures (arrays, linked lists, trees, graphs, hash maps). [Ed: I haven’t read it, but I suspect Knuth’s classic book would be good for this, and you get to swagger around the IT department. Other possibilities are “The Manga Guide to Data Structures” and the Great Courses series for learning Python.]

You can get books on,, There are huge torrents of programming books (presuming you are already comfortable with that software, which I understand is pretty common).

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Two pathological aspie cognitive biases

Aspies enjoy abstract conceptual frameworks immoderately. Most of the time this is okay, if off-putting to neurotypicals (“why do you have to constantly analyze everything?”), and sometimes it’s quite productive (e.g. engineering, programming). But this emotionality lends us to a couple of predictable sins which we must overcome.

The first bias is to conflate the map and the territory it describes. This is a tendency to forget that abstractions are approximations at the best of times, and often inaccurate. This bias is particularly strong when it relates to mental models we came up with for ourselves.

All non-trivial abstractions, to some degree, are leaky.

The Law of Leaky Abstractions
Joel Spolsky

Maybe the examples Spolsky gives are helpful if you’re a crackerjack programmer, but they don’t do anything for me so I’ll supply my own using the textbook example of abstraction.

The second story (perhaps apocryphal) is supposed to have happened during the infancy of electric power generation. General Electric Co. was having trouble with one of its huge electric power generators and did not know what to do. On the front of the generator were lots of dials containing lots of information, and lots of screws that could be rotated clockwise or counterclockwise as the operator wished. Something on the other side of the wall of dials and screws was malfunctioning and no one knew what to do. So, as the story goes, they called in one of the early giants in the electric power industry. He looked at the dials and listened to the noises for a minute, then took a small pocket screwdriver out of his geek pack and rotated one screw 35 degrees counterclockwise. The problem immediately went away. He submitted a bill for $1,000 (a lot of money in those days) without any elaboration. The controller found the bill for two minutes’ work a little unsettling, and asked for further clarification. Back came the new bill:

Turning a screw 35 degrees counterclockwise: $0.75
Knowing which screw to turn and by how much: $999.25


If the actuating end of the screw valve had been sheared off or corroded away, the engineer would have become confused and needed to perform additional troubleshooting on the valve as well as whatever was causing the gross symptoms.

The second bias is reductionism, a tendency to reduce all phenomena to as few mental models as possible. This was best expressed in an analogy by a commenter at Vox Popoli:

A second error is to think there is only one conceptual map. For example, when looking at literal maps there are road maps, cadastral maps, topographical maps, geological maps, ocean navigation maps, aeronautical maps, etc. I believe it is useful to navigate reality using multiple conceptual maps, as each provides a different perspective.

Comment re: Curiosity and cognitive paradigms

Frankly, this is the best description of Asperger’s I’ve ever seen. See also: libertarianism, anarcho-capitalism, Atheism++, and of course Jeremy Bentham.

If there is hope,’ sez me, ‘it lies in the bronies.’ If there was hope, it MUST lie in the autists, because only there in those swarming disregarded *chans, 85 per cent of the interwebz, could the force to destroy the Two-faced Party ever be generated. The Party cannot be overthrown from within.

Therefore it is our duty to overcome these monochromatic ideological tendencies and become pragmatic, breeding adults, because no one else could have defeated Hillary and no one else will defeat Soros.

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Vampire Hunter D: All Melonboons Go Back (to the heavens)

This movie falls into the 5th percenter category of awesome, but not sublime. Like Cowboy Bebop, I’d recommend it to normies without qualification.

There are a couple of excellent edenic archetypes that deserve mentioning without overmuch elaboration. The protagonist, a human-vampire hybrid, is a very good representation of MT personality (which is to say, as much personality as cannot be crushed by an indomitable will) and their basic inability to belong anywhere. Baron Meier Link’s story is a sympathetic tragedy of melonhead melancholy about the slow extinction of their subspecies. This supports my theory that vampires are a reliable mythical stand-in for charming melonhead sociopaths.

As the story progresses, Meier Link’s abduction of Charlotte turns out to not be as it seemed, as it’s revealed that Charlotte willingly ran away with Meier Link as his lover. Charlotte rightfully feared that no one would understand their relationship, with her a human and Link a vampire.


Their relationship doesn’t work out. I wouldn’t bet money on this having an esoteric meaning, but if it does then it means that melon-sapiens hybridization isn’t a viable strategy for preserving aristocratic genes.

In the final act of the film, Meier Link transports Charlotte in his carriage to the Castle of Chaythe, where Countess Carmilla, Meier Link’s matron, waits for them. Carmilla, a ghost of a vampire who died long ago, reigned supreme within the Castle of Chaythe when vampires were all-powerful and unchallenged. However, her bloodlust was so strong that D’s father, an ancient, noble vampire king, killed her in disgust.

I interpret this as a reference to the tendency of the feminine drives to get out of hand in failing civilizations, this ghost being the last relic of a dead race.

Carmilla promises Meier Link and Charlotte travel to a far away city known as the City of The Night, where they can be free to love each other, which they will travel to in a large and ancient spaceship-like structure hidden beneath the Castle of Chaythe. Carmilla explains that most ancient castles had similar ships hidden within them, and that back when vampires reigned supreme, these ships weren’t an uncommon means for vampires to travel to far regions.

I’m very confident in the interpretation of this part, using the aesthetic correspondence of space = heaven = supernatural realm, which is a very robust cipher. Just as airships = enlightened journey, spaceships = transdimensional journey, i.e. death or some other form of detachment from the material world.

It’s a good movie. You should watch it and tell me my interpretation is right and I’m the smartest guy.

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Pathological identity signalling

Edited: Previous label was gayer than Milo, fixed broken link, added awesome Entwaifu pun.

Pathological identity signalling is defined as “virtue signalling within a new moral framework which spirals into pathological inaction, because defining yourself as one of the special people means you don’t have to earn your virtue, reputation, or superiority.”

Pathological identity signalling is where a supreme gentleman learns a new concept or taxonomy and uses it (often immediately) to signal their high status and denigrate the low status of the outsider group. E.g. Vox invents the SSMV hierarchy where Sigma males are now the “best” type and Gammas are the “worst” type, so all the narcissists express themselves by signalling their Sigma behaviors and complaining about the Gammas. In the archetypal form, “It’s like this one time I was banging 10 chicks at once with perfect introverted aloofness and this Gamma comes along, I had to BTFO him with my 165 IQ and SEAL training (better than your krotty black belt lol). I hate Gammas lol.”

In a more pedestrian example, “My boy Xander isn’t stupid, he’s the ADD and needs very sensitive educators who understand his creativity and specialness. Did you know all of the geniuses like Neil deGrasse Tyson and the Einstein are the ADD? They have the better brains, much better for REAL LIFE and the streetz, not the normie wagecuck life like your kids. Normalfags are so gay they even have sex with each other and then happily married children, not like my boy Xander who is special and doesn’t need all that.”

In the neandersphere, it would look like this: “The way of the nobilid is comfy NEET schemes like Bitcoin mining in my mom’s basement, because wagecucking is for saps with their deceit and going-outsideness. How convenient that this is what I was already doing when I found this idea! Truly I am the NEET-chan superman by right of birth. MOM WHERE IS MY ENTWAIFU PILLOW, YOU KNOW YOU CAN’T TOUCH THAT.”

In the holistic mind, pathological identity signalling is perceived as a subtype of faggotry because it sabotages the male group and therefore group selection. It is also seen as a disgusting form of perverted weakness because it is pathological—believing I’m one of the special people is adaptively confidence-inspiring and apparently necessary for human males to get our dicks up, but if it discourages action and risk it will destroy my life by papercuts through a thousand missed opportunities.

This post is dedicated to Edenist Whackjob for kicking my ass about the brogramming thing because I’m getting too comfortable. He’s spending my fondness for him on my future benefit. That’s a good friend for you, who’ll do what’s best for you even if it means not being around to see it. I will respond to the comments soon, there’s been a lot of WINNING in those and a couple of questions it would be impolite to continue ignoring.

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