Only a cockroach could work in these conditions. Luckily, I AM THAT COCKROACH.
This is one of those funny-but-serious things. I don’t know who convinced women you could find life satisfaction in work but I want to hire him to sell Thalforce. (Speaking of which you might want to stock up, supplies are limited and Grimoire was released, so ITZ happening.) I don’t want to shit on my great life success—it’s just bad form for the King of Omegas to black pill his subjects. But I do want to complain a bit, so please understand this is just venting and not an indictment of MASSIVE INCLINE. Some of the details will be disinformation to make doxxing difficult, but it is not misrepresentation.
On a daily basis, 80% of my time is spent copying text out of a form field and pasting it into an Excel spreadsheet. There is nothing I’ve done in the last month that could not have been done automatically in less than a second by software written by someone who’s read the first half of a “Java for Dummies” book. But no, everything is forbidden. The software I use on a daily basis, written by a company with a 98% Indian workforce I might add, is only set up to process queries one line at a time. There are no batch jobs. My access is restricted so heavily by IT admins that I can’t perform basic job functions, and I have to go to my boss’s boss to do some of these queries for me. It sometimes takes me a week to quote prices to customers because nobody knows what they are. And that’s for relatively scarce goods! According to basic economic theory, this shouldn’t even be possible. Tentatively, I call this phenomenon “price entropy”.
This theme, information security to the point of uselessness, generalizes to every single thing I do at work. Practically speaking, there is nothing in life I can’t do, up to and including theoretical physics. There are only things that I’m not allowed to do by my conscience, by the chain of command, or by that very frustrating commandment to honor my parents.
It results from a culture of massive distrust and uncertainty throughout the company. This all stems from a seedy history, which I shall outline for general interest.
We’re a German transplant company with a global market, spun up from a garage by a 95-year-old dark genius using a ruthless theory of business that, presuming you can grok the mathematics, basically just says to target competitors and eat them one-by-one rather than competing. Business is not war and a scorched earth policy is not good for the economy, neoconservative broken window fallacies notwithstanding. So I highly respect our founder’s intellect and I expect his company will do very well in our 2nd-world nation, but he is ultimately a high-ability cancer and a real country would shut us down in a heartbeat.
The founder’s son and heir is not a genius by any stretch and is harmless on his best days. His former secretary is now the CEO of the American division of the company, wink wink nudge nudge, and she is ANYTHING but harmless. People around here, hundreds of miles from the corporate headquarters, are hesitant to say her name, much less criticize her openly. I would not be surprised if she has an honest-to-goodness network of spies. One time, a guy I know made her niece mad and HR went through his company car’s GPS records and found some data they could use to accuse him of smoking inside the car. The niece has since been promoted to the director level of something or other, which would provoke a nepotism policy violation to HR if the CEO hadn’t already filled HR entirely with her family members. If only her ability to play politics were matched by her ability to make technical decisions, we might be able to do business. But no, she calls ALL of the shots, they are ALWAYS wrong and no one will EVER tell her so or even suggest it to someone else except in hushed voices away from the cameras.
So with all this mess and inefficiency, you’d think the company would collapse because capitalism. But no, business is booming! Because of the optimism boom following Trump’s election there’s so much money flying through the air right now I wouldn’t be surprised if we’d bought a hotel or two by accident when we’d only meant to rent the lobby for a day. Meanwhile there are hundreds of us lower-middle class wage slaves doing what clerks have done for centuries, copying numbers from one account book into another by hand, one line at a time. I have an abstract cast of mind and can see how this must play out, and it’s very black pilling.
If I took any pride in my work, I’d kill myself. IF.