I ought to explain my previous comment because I don’t want to cause anyone to stumble.
Generally, I’ve assumed the default position that sex before marriage is illicit. This is the same as my position on monogamy. I’ve never examined either belief in a serious way, it’s simply something I inherited from Western traditional culture as found north of the Hajnal line. This traditionalism is, within the scope of my unserious knowledge on the subject, the strongest argument against premarital sex. Monogamy and waiting until marriage are also my first instincts, as it’s always struck me as irresponsible in the extreme to have sex if I can’t afford to support the potential child.
However, I recognize that my instincts are often maladaptive. My inclination is to wait until the elders of my tribe arrange my marriage and then work to make that pairing as successful as possible. Obviously that scenario will never happen in a low-trust social milieu, so I have to examine reality as it stands and adapt. The Bible says God will provide to those who ask, but it also says a man who doesn’t work shouldn’t eat. Clearly then, there are two mistakes to avoid: 1) merely asking God for a wife and not seeking one, and 2) only seeking a wife on my own terms and not asking God to provide.
So now that I have the means to provide for one (1) child, I have the desire to do so. Because I’m autistic, this forces me to resolve the paradoxes raised by the current sociosexual climate. Approximately zero girls will marry a 30-year-old virgin because they won’t be attracted to him, on account of the celibacy acting as negative social proof (the only possible explanation, they reason, is that the man is a loser). She may be attracted to a 20-year-old virgin because such a young man can reasonably claim to be a late bloomer (in R-selected terms), and not a loser (certainly not an Alpha WINNER though, because such a man will have deflowered girls in high school). Within the moral framework I’ve inherited, where premarital sex is always a sin, 99% of men who remain virgins at 25 will thereafter be celibate for life. And this is what we generally see in the modern church, insofar as young men attend at all (they don’t).
This raises Koanic’s point, which I regard as the strongest case in favor of premarital sex being moral in some situations. The modern sociosexual situation is unprecedented in the Bible. Girls have always been sloots, just as men have always been gangsters, but it has not been that the church and state have colluded in a massive, multi-generational religious propaganda campaign to destroy the nuclear family. If we accept that this is true, we must also expect that much of our received knowledge is specifically intended to cuck us. And this is observably true: the advice of my parents, teachers, and pastors for dealing with the opposite sex have been unfailingly delusional and disastrous. If Jesus is Truth, then he is present in the PUA community (and absent from the church) because that’s where truth about sexuality can be found.
If God considered reproduction merely a necessary evil, then he would not have used it as a reward for the patriarchs. Taking an outside perspective, it would dishonor my parents for me to end the paternal line merely because muh neanderthal maturation trajectory, just as it would dishonor them if I continued in the NEET lifestyle. Furthermore, if God loves me (a premise for which I have considerable evidence!) and would prefer to give me bread rather than a snake, it follows that he would not want me to burn with frustrated lusts except as necessitated by dysfunctions inherited from sin (compare to blindness, lameness). That conclusion would be pure masturbation, which is more or less equivalent to the original sin. Therefore, I claim that if it’s possible for me to marry and not disobey God, I should do it. However, I need to examine some things more closely that I’d never needed to examine before.
I ought to warn you all ahead of the inevitable arguments that I’m not really interested in your opinion on this particular matter. Sexuality is possibly the most emotional realm of human life after religiosity, and therefore a hotbed of psychosis, disinformation, and conceit, and so I’m going to play it close to the chest. That said, I’ll be thinking out loud, on the blog, as is my INTJ habit.
Edit: Many thanks to Boneflour for entertaining in my absence. The woo must flow.