Why are even dumb 80s movies still better than modern capeshit?Owl
Because they were still attempting to be archetypal and thus serve as good memes.
I’d rather watch cape shit personally though. 80s movies are unforgivably boring to actually watch.
There’s usually about two scenes per movie that are worth seeing, and about 90 minutes of slow-paced filler.
Escape from New York was an absolute slog.
They Live was worse.
If you’ve seen a single sunglasses on, sunglasses off meme you’ve seen literally everything that movie has to offer.
Xer irony-posting is cringe. Like in They Live when they’re punching each other and he’s yelling “put on the glasses” I knew I was supposed to be laughing, but I just felt bad for the intended audience.
Can you imagine having such a self-protective wall up that everything- cosmic horror, action scenes, the truth itself- has to be this production where you’re assuring everyone watching it that you aren’t serious?
You get this shitscape where everything is shit on purpose to be funny, but then everything is still just shit. At least Zoomer irony-posting is directed at other people, Xer posting is just a giant self-deprecating hedge against cringe so everybody thinks any cringe was intentional. Haha look at how bad my clown costume is! I wasn’t even trying!
Gen X is a hundred million people competing desperately to be seen as trying the least hard.
I like punch fights dammit. Make a good one and don’t apologize for trying and failing to make it perfect!
80s movies are trash and not even all that archetypal. When I want archetypes I go further back in time to when Hollywood had ambitions.
Did you know Lawrence of Arabia was made in 1962?
It’s almost 4 hours long and every scene is better than any 80s movie.
“Cleopatra” and “The Great Escape” were around the same timeframe, if I recall correctly
Even Star Wars suffered from this change. Everybody says Empire Strikes Back was the best because it was quotable, but try to read the plot summary without your eyes glazing over: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Empire_Strikes_Back#Plot
It wasn’t *about* anything.
It’s hard to even think about the movie as a whole because there’s no “there” there, it’s just a vague notion of “winter fight, swamp training, cloud city political stuff”.
Even the prequels had better plots than that.
Imagine if the flowchart of your space western has a big bubble saying “spy shit” at the climax part.
Even as a kid I didn’t like Empire.
It was boring.
We only rented it once and even though we watched the other two a few times each, I never felt the desire to watch Empire again.
In conclusion, fuck the 80s.
Unironically the least ambitious and most try-hard decade of all.
Van Halen’s guitar style was terrible and I’m glad he’s dead.
lol tell me how you really feel
just let it rip
I don’t have anything left.
Temple of Doom could have been a great movie if it had been made in a different year. Great premise, great setting…wisecracking monkey sidekick.
That’s probably the best description of the 80s.