I have a theory that diaspora Jews, like mothers, have no concept of the difference between negative reward and positive punishment. You can think of this as how libertarians will tell you to boycott a company as “punishment”. This isn’t a punishment, it’s negative reward. You’re removing a pleasurable thing. Positive punishment is when you introduce a painful thing.
It’s not quite that Jews and women don’t punish, it’s that when they get angry they have no picture in their heads of what good punishment looks like to compare their behavior to for self-regulation/self-control. There’s no moment of reflection where they think “this is a bad look, this isn’t how behavior-modifying punishment is supposed to look”. They just put the object of their anger in the “monster” category and proceed to dehumanize and destroy it. The only thing that keeps most women from medieval torturing their naughty children is they can’t stay angry at their babies and they don’t have much in the way of real bloodlust. So the worst a five year old can expect (from a mother whose religion/husband don’t require spanking) is a genuinely cutting remark before the feeling passes.
I should make a distinction here, because women and Jews do use social positive punishment for controlling and maintaining a consensus narrative for group cohesion. So what I mean is they don’t use controlled violence to maintain a consensus of behavior, i.e. mores (so a “moral” consensus). In fact, like women, they consistently oppose any imposition of norms for behavior, such as definitions of crime. So where the masculine position is not caring what you think, and only caring what you actually do, the feminine position is only caring what you think and not caring what you actually do. The exception, in both cases, is when talk or action disrupts the masculine morality or feminine narrative.
I think this Jewish tendency occurs for the same reason as in women. They don’t self-police because there hasn’t been any selection for self-policing. And policing is the application of controlled positive punishment. Controlled violent force. What’s interesting is that this lack of control, combined with low time preference, results in a controlled extermination of the “monsters”. They don’t think to themselves “if I give white people a slap on the wrist, they’ll exhibit self-control next time” they go right to “these people are monsters…but there are a lot of them, so we need to prepare to wage this war a thousand years across several empires”. In the meantime, their neighborhoods are full of pedophiles because, even if they don’t like the behavior, they can’t imagine hurting a fellow Jew for any reason. That would require some way of transmuting them from the “Jew” mental category to one of the “not Jew” categories, “monster”, which doesn’t compute.
So there’s no middle setting between zero and “do the worst things I can imagine to this monster”. There’s no “light spanking” vs. “hard spanking”. Other than negative reward, like boycotts or quietly moving your children out of the neighborhood where the rabbi is raping children.