Meta-feeling

Meta-feeling is having feelings about feelings. Obvious in retrospect. For example, I may feel happy when I see porn and then also feel disgusted at how easily I’ve been manipulated. It’s analogous to metacognition, which is observing one’s own thoughts and having thoughts about those thoughts. Unlike metacognition, which entails a subjective experience of “stepping back” and implies a moderate sense of dissociation, I suspect meta-feeling entails the opposite subjective experience (leaning in?). I don’t have this capacity myself so it’s hard to say, or at least it happens so rarely as makes no difference (i.e. I just feel the happy part from the porn and have to think/guilt my way out of it), but it makes sense theoretically that such a capacity could exist and would represent the high end of emotional intelligence and charisma. What follows are speculations from attempting to empathize.

I suspect this faculty is necessary for those engaging in myth-weaving and propaganda, AKA smart theater kids AKA melonheads. One would have to mentally simulate an audience’s reactions to one’s emotions while also channeling one’s own emotions as part of the performance. It certainly strikes me that such an experience could be addictive on account of its intensity and by analogy to the “addiction to insight” that I’ve speculated is half of the genius addiction. Because it’s related to very high social intelligence, I suspect that very smart blacks like Prince are also high in this trait–the operative difference being that Prince used it to make himself a legend, whereas melonheads do the archetype spiraling thing to create mythical archetypes for the collective.

This form of self-reflection may be the foundation of objective taste, where a man can distinguish between what he likes and what’s actually good. It probably correlates with a large, complex amygdala.

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16 Responses to Meta-feeling

  1. ShadoHand says:

    This is the libs getting to you with their whole “Anger is connected to fear.” No anger is a sign a boundary has been crossed. It shows you where your boundaries are.

    I view emotions as a color pallate:
    IrritatedAngerRage

    Theres emotional color wheel images you can go look up.

    I also try to turn my envy, when I feel it, into disgust, and sometimes contempt. Especially when the person its directed at has an deep intellectual understanding that is exceeded by a massive amount of monetary gains.

    At the same time if someone has a large amount of money, but no intellectual understanding, I feel sorrow for them and for what could be, but never will be.

  2. MM says:

    It can get really complicated.

    1. someone you love dies
    2. You are very sad
    (amongst other feelings such as perhaps rage at universe etc. Each has its own line of development and these lines can inform each other!)
    3. You are partially happy that you are sad because it is proof to yourself that you really cared and you like this, but also increases hurt in a bit of emotional spiral because-
    4. You now become even more sad and distraught when you realize beyond any doubt that you really REALLY cared about (loved) the person in question and you will never see them again (or you believe in an afterlife and you are filled with a feeling of happiness but also perhaps of a profound sense of mystery and confusion)
    5. Coping responses may now come in- namely distraction. A healthy normie will interact with others, talk about the person with them, etc. An autistic presumably will turn to a pet interest to distract. A schizoid will escape into art/a tv show, game, etc that is either completely opposite in tone (happy, childish) or that actually deals with the problem (schizoid may even realize this). A narcissist (depending on intellect and thus proficiency of manipulation) may say stupid cliches that will make you ‘die inside’ (especially at the funeral) as they show that they have no real apparent understanding of what just happened, and no real care. Everyone else will mistake (rationalize) this as them ‘putting on a good face’… Alternatively, a narcissist may fall apart entirely (mortification) if the person was an essential source of supply such as a parent, spouse, etc. Cue many Vaknin vids on that. Psychopaths? I have no idea tbh.

    And of course people aren’t just one thing so usually all of this would ATTEMPT to happen to some extent but actual behavior seems to either be, at different times, either incredibly democratic, executive, or (scarily) entirely divorced from what you think ‘you’ are thinking and that ‘you’ will do as you are reminded that there are other things besides you in your little… pocket-brain-universe-thing and they very well can run the show (IE a compulsion- to do drugs, ‘not think about it’, wtvr that at very least is very VERY hard to fight).

    • MM says:

      >Each has its own line of development and these lines can inform each other!

      Wait a minute… thats just fucking music… with a chord being a meta-emotion.

      • MM says:

        No, that’s no right, the chord is a “binding”- a commonality of emotion
        (except perhaps with some use of counterpoint in which the parts are coming together to form ‘strong’ chords {as there will always theoretically be some chord} that re-contextualize the rest of the piece which is totally possible I suppose. If anyone knows a song that does that please point to it)
        (chord strength will be implied by increased volume, use of transient such as drums and cymbals along with the chord, novel sound or effect to increase importance to memory system)

        A Polychord, depending on the chord itself and how it is sounded (pitch, instrument/harmonic profile, panning, application of distortion, effects) may represent the likely feeling of a mixed-emotion or rare emotion (especially if there is a vocal line making a parsable lyrical statement that ultimately re contextualizes the sound of the chord as indeed representing logically what the sound implies emotionally)

        But that is not enough for ‘meta-emotion’ to arise, merely ‘mixed-emotion’ or ‘rare emotion’ (which for practical reasons of people being VERY complex- you would expect poly chord to regularly show up with any song that tries to actually express the feeling of a meta emotion- yes double meta Im frying muh brain) to arise, it would naturally be at the ‘total song’ layer and even then not super common.

        This could all be entirely wrong…

        • MM says:

          Whereas ‘mixed emotion’ (sadness, happy memory ):

          (because inclusion of positive past memory, nostalgia, as opposed to ‘raw sadness’- which would be more appropriate over a death whereas this song sounds more like a breakup of a fairly meaningful but not ‘life-crucial’. Sung from the viewpoint of an ‘innocent’ subject vs entitled, embittered, wtvr)

          • MM says:

            Chord at 13 seconds (yes I could just look it up but sound is fun)

            This chord is a complex emotion that captures the spirit of the piece, and is itself not a meta emotion, perhaps just a very good summary once you look at it.

            Looking at the peaks of spectrum:
            f1 c1 f2 c3 d3 d4 a4
            transpose for ease of analysis:
            c1 g2 c2 g2 A2 E3(lowered volume to decrease ‘wholeness’ and be a bit sadder but still there) A3 E4

            So the voicing of the chord appears to be two stacks of octaved power chords, one 2 semitones above the other.
            (if you collapse the top two octaves into the first two you can determine the actual identity of the chord is a very interestingly sounded major add 6 chord)
            (the actual sound in the song matches this more than the double stack, which is why spectrum is usually just approximation. Prob because one of the voices moves a bit, so its actually subtly 2 chords but now I dont want to rewrite this tbh)

  3. MM says:

    This is perhaps the most interesting topic in a long time, so lets try to go further if possible:

    rewritten so I could make sense of it, tell me If I did something wrong-

    AP-Meta-feeling is having a feeling about a feeling.
    (had to rewrite because I was confusing it with an emotional feeling [IE hatred] about the very existence of all emotional feelings)
    AP-I may feel happy when I see porn and then also feel disgusted at how easily I’ve been manipulated.

    Its way more complicated for me on the whole but those would also be my primary responses in most mood-states,
    a mood-state being the inital conditions of the mind (and pain/other signals from body) prior to the first input (porn here).
    The conscious and unconscious minds can probably be in different mood-states depending on what a human mind actually is.
    (they certainly can have utterly opposite ‘opinions’)

    AP-Unlike metacognition, which entails a subjective experience of “stepping back” and implies a moderate sense of dissociation,
    AP I suspect meta-feeling entails the opposite subjective experience (leaning in?).
    AP-I don’t have this capacity myself so it’s hard to say

    Take ONE (1) on “I suspect meta-feeling entails the opposite subjective experience (leaning in?)”

    When a thought about a feeling triggers another feeling, two feeling experianced in close enough proximity,
    without time to process them, will feel like one slurred mixed feeling.

    Not in the literal moment- if one was paying close enough attention they would recognize there were two emotions-
    but perhaps even seconds later the MEMORY would be of one mixed emotion. Certainly later on down the line as the memory eroded this would become
    more and more the case.

    Side track A :
    this gave me a realization of a possible explanation of nostalgia:
    the blurring of happy/sad past states
    + sense of pain over loss of the past
    + idealization

    Side track B:
    what happens when a feeling changes with no thought at all?
    Subconscious thought,
    change in bodily sensations,
    loss or increase of energy,
    Potentially any input from any sense if it is of a high enough strength will of course totally change a thought
    What is distraction
    (you are allowing too much of it, just look upward… finish the post! <—was this me or someone else?
    The thought 'came out of nowhere' but was experianced as 'still me')

    Side track C:

    Call back to:
    "The conscious and unconscious minds can probably be in different mood-states depending on what a human mind actually is.
    (they certainly can have utterly opposite 'opinions')"

    Its clear that the subsconscious and its wants increasingly become stronger the more mentally exhausted one becomes.
    Unless someone has a very strong addiction then its usually only when someone is at their weakest that such a thing is very hard
    to resist.

    Side track C2 (generated after C1 even though it appears here)
    Insert after "its usually only when someone is at their weakest that such a thing is very hard
    to resist"

    (and the subconscious- or whatever component of the subconscious that is [dont want to decry the whole thing perhaps]
    is smart enough to know that. What is VERY intersting is how infrequent such a mechanism becomes 'exhausted'. It seems to take
    'attentional time away from its craving' more than anything else. It is possible to bargain with it, but it wants to
    do exactly whatever it wants and so its usually dumb to do so if there is anything MORAL about the situation and we aren't talking about
    food, where you can make a deal like: this food is delicious and healthy and we all (in the brain) agree with that
    It will say "me want choccy milk anyway, fuck you asshole" but then you remind it that choccy milk KILLS YOU and then only a very small part of
    it will still say 'Me still want' because it is very afraid of death. This all only really happens of the rest of the brain is exhausted
    , demoralized, etc. and so it can spread its tendrils and start controlling behavior more and more)

    'mental exhaustion' makes it harder to resist
    -distraction
    -an addiction
    -self
    soothing
    -anger
    -narcissistic thoughts as cope (though it takes more than exhaustion,
    I bet its a defense mechanism that seems to show up, at least for a while, in anyone if
    you put them in a shitty enough situation. Its like… frustration over self value? or something<— see, I'm getting tired.
    A voice just told me to stop. I told it to go to hell.

    What, ultimately, is mental exhaustion?
    Especially if there is a soul? Hmmm need to look into sleep and dreams.

    Meta Side track 01:
    all of these non numbered side tracks were generated by different copies of me (actual me, er…)(experainced subjectively as much lower amplitude versions
    of my prime internal voice) more or less simulatanoeusly and it was only through
    great effort that the initial strings were held on to by my memory long enough to actually explore them.

    (the different 'takes' had to be more or less totally re-generated by the time I got around to them, and surely many were lost, but also many simply
    were not worth the time or effort most likely <— is that cope? actually I think this is accurate. I? Yes. W e will say yes.

    In the same way, you have read all these things and had many many lines of thought- all of them useful- but one had the greatest resonance and this
    is likely to take up practically all mental power to explore. This will lead to some degree of exhaustion or boredom and all those potential lines
    of thinking will unfortunately die (inorganically not through accurate???/ something) either via distraction or as prime interpretation is coded in memory and then potentially
    tied to ego ('thats MY opinion' 'and Im so fucking special so of course Im not going to change it' a small degree of this is certainly healthy so
    we dont waste all our time but this opens up another avenue for exhaustion to trigger a narcissistic response which may or may not be misplaced:
    'you are not worth taking the mental effort to determine if I need to run back through all that shit')

    Meta side track 02:
    "Seconds later" Isn't that interesting language? Its a recognition that a second, the instance, is of course not the first.
    Which is either an allusion to prime consciousness of moment or a recognition that consciousness is ultimately an incredibly
    complex form of harmonic distortion (universe as a harmonic- second to God (1), whith 'prime' consciousness if it exists itself a 'second' of that second.

    The above is crazy theorizing but obviously there are waves in the brain, and undoubtedly the brain has a huge fascination with harmonic distortion
    of music, film, etc. Even distortion is hard to hear (but sounds good if intermodulation can be controlled) and odd distortion is
    easy to hear. The easiest (lower) harmonic to hear is the third, and it also is the best sounding imo
    (but if applied to something that has already been distorted, naturally you are generating a
    5th- still good
    or 7th or higher- nasty but has use. Think dimebag darrel gutar tone (though that is not free from even, its just obv a first stage followed
    by mountains of odd order)

    In the same way, you have read all these things and had many many lines of thought- all of them useful- but one had the greatest resonance and this
    is likely to take up practically all mental power to explore. This will lead to some degree of exhaustion or boredom and all those potential lines
    of thinking will unfortunately die (inorganically not through accurate???/ something) as prime interpretation is coded in memory and then potentially
    tied to ego ('thats MY opinion' 'and Im so fucking special so of course Im not going to change it' a small degree of this is certainly healthy but this
    opens up another avenue for exhaustion to trigger a narcissistic response: 'you are not worth taking the mental effort to determine if I need to
    run back through all that shit')

    /
    Take TWO (2) on "I suspect meta-feeling entails the opposite subjective experience (leaning in?)"

    Ultimately, yes, (it is more like that than not) as the purely analyticaly logical and linguistic mode is certainly not the most-true self, though it likes to think it
    is the most competent self because soy-sciety (a Biciferous statement indeed. Treestump-moon-egg and all that, no insult meant BICE).
    Then again, the focal point of vision must be crucially related to consciousness since that where so much of it
    'feels' to be and when you shut your eyes you can feel this low oscillation in the back of your head replace it, after which listening is
    much easier, but it takes several minutes for the Mind's Eye to switch on so all that visual information is sorely missed for a while.

    That all being said, its not just one or the other 4 shore.

    • MM says:

      I got mentally exhausted and had to stop :/

    • MM says:

      RE: Side Track C2

      “”only a very small part of
      it will still say ‘Me still want’ [in the face of death]

      three entities or circuits (that may work together if needed :
      1. actually enjoys destroying the rest of the self. Unfortunately this is the smartest of these three, I don’t think it’s the death drive, and I’m… not really sure why its in the brain

      2. -is too stupid to even understand that, so it still wants what it wants
      3. -knows when you are lying and isn’t going to be scared by anything short of a really good short-term reason (number one may be a twisted subcomponent of this, a self questioning algorithm with little long term thinking -or something- that has evolved to the point of existing for the ‘pleasure’ -potentially just raw ‘neural supply’- of making the rest of the self suffer. I want to say this reminds me of the D Reaper from Digimon Tamers but I haven’t seen that show since a little bit as a kid maybe and then clips)

  4. MM says:

    Wake up, its 2015!

  5. Obadiah says:

    1:02 Coronavirus
    1:20 Complacent sheeple in money-info prison
    1:26 “There’s something in the air that feels like winter, the kind we used to know” as they’re dancing in front of skulls
    2:07 Sheeple start to “think about it” and become aware of their situation
    2:28 – 2:40 Line go down
    2:42 Sheeple start to escape, glowniggers btfo. Then they drive to the city and cruise or something.

    Video seems to be revelation-of-method or “admitting” that if we “think about it” and pull our head out of our ass/not abdicate moral responsibility then we’re in pretty good shape despite less-than-fun events.

    (Had to get that one out of my head.)

    • MM says:

      Damn thats a good snare sound…

      rom- Yeah that looks like it.

      The most un-subtle I’ve ever seen (for anyone interested):

      • MM says:

        Alot of messages but if it wasn’t clear (3 min 5 sec in) they either intend to create a new universe/break out of this one.

        The frame of ‘critique of narcissistic grandiosity/landfill modern economy and society’ is a cover.

        Supposed satire/critique as plausibly-deniable propaganda is very common. IE- Wall Street, That pedo ‘cuties’ show Netflix made supposedly to show why you should never sexualize children… whilst strongly sexualizing actual child actors and selling the whole thing. I’m sure Devon Stack has a list of every movie of this type by now.

        Of course accidentally glamorizing something bad happens all the time even by accident.
        But if lines are crossed and/or there is big money behind it…

        (As always, watch what people actually DO, not what is said, to determine likely reality. VS normie “get captured in various reality distortion fields, trust the plan whilst ‘glorious leader’ clearly stabs you in the back”).

  6. ShadoHand says:

    I almost lost it last night. I saw a link. And I had to stop myself. Dont worry I didnt break Aeoli. You will lose, and it will be marvelous.

  7. MM says:

    Important vid in regards to OG post, my rant above, and in general psychology (not at all narcissism bound):

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