I had occasion to listen to a leftist podcast, Behind the Bastards, that was recommended to me as “If there’s one left winger you’d like, it’s him.” It was a good guess, I enjoyed part 1 of the MK Ultra series and will probably finish it.
From my outsider perspective, it was curious to hear them apologizing to the audience for the possible perception that they could be criticizing recreational psychedelic use, even though they weren’t. It reminded me of when Nazi podcasts stray toward what may be perceived as criticism of Germans, paganism, instinctiveness, the working class, socialism, etc., or may be perceived as complimentary of Jews, capitalism, counterintuitive analysis, the upper middle class, etc. I’d include a comparison to Christian podcasts here for fairness if I considered any of them relevant other than the Godcast, as the genre consists entirely of women and effeminate men.
This inb4 apologizing behavior is essentially a “frontlash” or a disclaimer attempting to head off purity-spiraling, self-appointed witch-hunting commenters with middling IQs and nothing better to do. These concern trolls are the internet ideological equivalent of ambulance chasers except instead of money they do it for upcummies. However, they serve the invaluable purpose of explicitly proclaiming inviolable taboos in a particular subculture, to which even the king must at least pay lip service.
To make the practical takeaway of this post absolutely clear, the litmus test is the emotional nature of the thought leader’s response to the concern trolling. If the concern troll says “How dare you say X?! and the thought leader tells him to go fuck himself, then he isn’t even paying lip service to X. If the thought leader says “We agree X is good/bad but let’s be reasonable about means and ends”, then he’s mixing pragmatism into his idealism. If the thought leader says “It sounds like I’m saying X but I’m actually not, and here’s a quote from holy writ that backs up what I’m saying” that’s a good sign you need to take your sandals off, because you’re walking on holy ground.
That both the host and the guest of Behind the Bastards had to spend 15 minutes explaining that reporting the CIA’s nefarious use of psychedelics doesn’t imply they want to discourage recreational drug use suggests substance use is a point of ideological purity where the audience will punish any deviations from a core belief. It reminds me of a puff piece on Democrat activists The American Sun linked a while back:
If you read between the lines, you realize these people are all a bunch of late-stage alcoholics and druggies. (I’ve coined the term trannissaries vs. xanniessaries to describe this internal leftist dialectic. They probably have comparable life expectancies.)
Example from the lede:
David Shor and Sean McElwee were late, having come half-cocked from the Dissent Magazine issue release party earlier in the afternoon — “We’re socialists,” McElwee said with a shrug by way of explanation — and took their seats outside a dive bar on Manhattan’s Lower East Side, asking the bartender to bring two of whatever his most popular cocktail was. They downed those, clear concoctions that looked like headaches in a glass, then asked him to come back with the second most popular cocktail.
Like I said, reading between the lines, you realize they would have been day-drinking at that release party earlier in the afternoon (as described elsewhere in the article). Double-digit drinks by the end of lunch on a weekday and not being falling-down drunk is a very, very bad level of drinking because it indicates the sort of dependency where withdrawal would be life-threatening. If you’re a 30-year-old man who’s drinking like that and not feeling it, then your life expectancy is comparable to transsexuals’, without any exaggeration.
Having been around a few substance abusers in my time, it makes sense why it would overlap with being a narcissistic woke-thumper. Substance abusers develop a secondary Mr. Hyde personality as part of the addiction to justify further substance abuse, and they’re prone to experience negative feelings very strongly because the addiction physically breaks down the parts of the brain that process those feelings. “I feel bad therefore I drink.” It’s a vicious spiral.
Narcissism follows the same pattern, “I feel bad therefore I signal and beg for upcummies”, so there’s a lot of overlap. Much of what we take for runaway narcissism on the left may in fact just be the symptoms of alcoholism and antidepressant addiction (looking at you, Jordan Peterson). Ref. also https://aeolipera.wordpress.com/2021/05/07/alternative-theory-the-dark-triad-makes-you-a-worse-leader-all-else-being-equal-but-a-great-figurehead-for-puppetmasters/
Aeoli Pera 
You havent released my comments yet, and let the Nuerocrazy get the last word.
Also “Narcissism follows the same pattern, “I feel bad therefore I signal and beg for upcummies”
This is what a Normie thinks narcissism is. That is to say “Im doing it all for the positive attention.” Smarter people say “Well theres negative attention too.” A preceptive person whose had to deal with it up close would say “Narcissism is a destrutive, and layered disorder. Thats why its so incidious. They literally bore there way in like termites, and causw your house to collapse right under you.”
We can get glimpses of the full spectrum of NPD, but never the full picture all at once. This is why they say “I know you better than you know yourself.” They are talking about themselves. I.e. “My ego knows my true self better than my true self knows it self.”
Yet somehow our society props these people up and the worst of them rarely have anything bad happen to them. Narcissism is not a trauma disorder caused by something in childhood. Its what happens when Negative Reinforcement or Negative Punishment never comes.
This fits my school experience. Back in school, the far left/antifa sympathizers were the druggies, while the smartest, most accomplished students were mostly pretty much on the right end of the normieworld spectrum.
The former’s leader was a guy with a strange surname and a very peculiar nose … oh, well …
For some reason, this was also the primary group organizing school events.
There was an anarchist musician (?) back in the day who had the following idea:
Divide Germoney into 3 parts: One for the anarchists/leftists/punks who don’t want any rules and dislike work, one for the natzies, and one for all the normal people who care about their careers and want to have everything tidy and ordered.
Though what would the third group have from this, other than not having to suffer the other’s presence?
That’s a good division, and even now it matches my experience of CS students in the online college program. Just under half are vaguely right of center but they still watch shows like Rings of Power and appear to be okay with everything around them being trash. The other (almost) half is drug users and sexual degenerates who are getting passed through these classes with Cs somehow, despite being wrecks of human beings with…we’ll say bad study habits.
For example, I had a group member who was basically absent from the last half of the class because he was having anxiety attacks and sleep dysregulation issues, and his Slack avatar is an androgynous furry.
`one for all the normal people who care about their careers and want to have everything tidy and ordered.`
Nothing is tidied and order. Nothing. Modern standards of hygiene, and order, have been weaponized. If I so much as leave a single piece of paper 2 nano meters out of place some idiot is going to yell and scream at me. Ive had it happen enough times in multiple different environments to know its a thing.
Or ofalctory rhetoric kicks in and they start bitching about you smelling. When your only smell is sweat because you just worked outside in a heat wave. And they will bitch that you smell while you are walking to a shower to freshen up. And yes thats a thing. Ive literally had this normies yell at me about this after I just walked inside and am going to take a shower. Or I am still working and going to take a shower in a couple of hours. There need for order has been weaponized.
Actually, its even more insane. At one job I was doing manual labor. Id get dirty everyday and start to sweat. It was 12 hour shifts. Some idiot complained to management. And heres where the gammas stop reading.
There was this old guy there. My first day working near him. I could literally smell him from 50 feet away. Next day too. Smelled like sort of death mixed with soap. I bet he showered before woek and his water was bad. At the start of shift I ignored it, because it would dissipate after about 20 minutes.
I brought it up to another coworker after we got reported for “wandering around.” In reality they say us coming back from the bathroom while the machines were down and assumed we were wandering around.
Anyway He said “I thought he was homeless. But then I just ignored it.” Dude was a Black guy who said this. We both realized we were dealing with insane white people who had no since of reality.
This old man literally smelled everyday before work. Like literal death. Like fucking death. It got worse when I could tell the fear kicked it.
But me who showers every day, gets accused of smelling because Im sweating while Im performing labor nonstop for 12 hours. Like hello, anyone would smell. So I went and got scent bomb. Sprayed myself down everyhour. Smelled nice. Did it in front of this old guy. He literally shuddered in his footsteps. Literally shuddered.
So you see Nuerocrazies why I think you are nuts. You literally cannot identity hazards and assume everything is bad.
This doesnt even get into the insanity of that time I got accused of smelling while riding my bike 6 miles in a freaking heatwave in dress clothes. When I arrived back at my apartment my landlord was standing in the door and started telling me I smell. I looked him in the eye and told him “Get out of my way Im going to shower right now.” I then realized what was going on. One of the idiot roommates probably “smelled” me a couple days before as I walked past them and said hello while I was drenched in sweat. Now heres the thing. I would come home and first thing take a shower. Which means I wouldnt smell anymore. Thats how insane these people are. Like totally completely insane. I even had a manger confirm I didnt smell, and my girlfriend and the time didnt get it either.
These people are everywhere and there deep need for, frankly, impossible standards of hygiene have been weaponized. Fuck every last Nuerocrazy on this planet.
It is time we eradicrate them from the face of the earth.
Oh yeah this doesnt even get into the time I had for coworkers tell a manager off about me smelling like garlic. “Of course he smells like garlic. He eats it in his lunch. The smell lingers in the air for a few minutes then goes away. And nobody smells it but you after that.”
I’m trying to think of a wordplay on Sigma grindset but it’s not coming to me.
Sigma Grindsweat! :D
https://trueataraxiaradio.wordpress.com/2023/01/31/ideal-diet-for-brain-function/
A different kind of substance use.
“Substance use as conservative ideology”= shoving ronald mcdonalds greasy cock (sandwich) down your throat as your fat wife dies of Uber-diabetes and you wonder why your gay autistic son is gay and autistic before the final light of awareness leaves your fetid, decaying mind as a wave of serotonin washes over you from the gallon of mountain dew you just drank whilst you watch sweaty black men try to violently grab balls with ‘black lives matter’ flags flying in the background. Feels good to be a Winner, ey America?
Makes me… Grimace.
That’s my Watership Down post, coming soon.
`day-drinking at that release party earlier in the afternoon`
Yep day drinking is very dirty leftist behavior. Never got it. Other than maybe a party at the cove, or after a 6 long days of work, then kick out have a few brewskis, it was always leftist.
Bottomless Mimosas are straight up a metaphor for degeneracy. I dont understand how the DUI rate isnt highet after those things have come out. When I was still drinking I remember being at a packed bar/restaurant on a Saturday afternoon. People were pounding them at the counter. Total insanity.
Now back to this DUI issue. How the frell arent there more lefties with DUIs? Or just people in general. If I go to a city on the weekend I can see tons of people drinking. Cops rarely do anything. Hell, Ive driven drunk. Once I got followed and would have blown like .20 or .25. Luckily the officer didnt pull me over. He had followed me all the way from the bar at the casino.
Another time I got woken up at 4am after falling asleep cause I didnt want to drive drunk. I was in my truck. As I stood there in the snow and wenr through all there tests I thought it was over. Then came the moment of truth. I blew into that breathylzer. It came back .036. Just under the legal limit. Which is .04 for commercial plates. They let me go with barely a warning. Crawled back inside the truck and went back to sleep.
Dont be like me, or these degenerate leftists. Pro-tip is to turn your lights off. The cops even told me “Turn your lights off next time. We wouldnt have even known you were in there, as its snowing out. We drove past twice and saw the lights on.”
But still: How are they getting away with all this drunk driving? Some of these people are probably high profile lawyers and doctors. The thing I think is its a testament to the leftist hive mind. The only other group you see it in is Boomers. They all cover for each other. Even if they have never met or spoken to one another.
The DUI question probably deserves its own post, because it’s a surprisingly complex topic. As you mentioned, it’s a symptom of neurotypical society.
`surprisingly complex topic`
When I was on a Bender. A couple people came to the bar after getting out jail for DUIs.
Plus its even worse than we can imagine. Come Friday and Saturday night once the bar closed everyone would drive to the casino. We are talking like 40 people. Then get drunk at the casino 24 hour bar until the sun came up. Hell I did it more than a few times alone. How I didnt get a ticket Idk. I slept in the parking garage a few times in the truck.
Hell one time, I wasnt even drunk, just had worked some insane swing shift and couldnt sleep. Sober as a judge. I drove out at like 1am to get a beer at the casino. Feel asleep sitting at the bar. When I came too, I felt embarrassed. Apprantly, the bartender had called security and the manager told them to just leave me, as they knew I wasnt drunk and was most likely just exhausted from work. Had another one then drove home.
And this is me being a responsible drinker. Theres people who are constantly drinking and are close to black out all day. This is why Alcohol should be banned. Well bars that dont double as restaurants, liquor stores and any other place, other than a gas station, should see alcohol banned from it. Except Church of course. We need the Blood of Christ.
Anything that self gratifies with no clear and purposeful mind towards the good is dangerous whether that be the pleasure drugs, or distractions from reality, or grandiosities. ‘Fun’ and ‘pleasure’ are truly the worst things by themselves, and sow ruin wether that is drugs, porn, video games, or even an addiction to rehashing what one knows, going over the same ground; its a night light. Comfort is an illusion, a small death. You have to suffer for what is real, always. And then it is time for a sleep. That’s the ideal anyway- you can have plenty of fun in doing but if there is no pain… something is wrong (maybe one just needs rest. take nap).
ANYWAY- Almost agree with the post but it remains true that if I had never smoked any weed in high school I would never had read this blog or koanic soul or become super right wing (was more of a libertarian that was ‘alex jones tier’ pilled). Would have been way more functional, probably married and shit. But I daresay some things are more important. I see at least the possibility to figure out what this place is before our society collapses/and or I die, and pursing that doesn’t mean the other things can’t be obtained. If I had remained a functional somewhat-normie then I’d just live life’s script and never care about what’s behind the curtain.
Anyway, I still think weed is shit mind you, especially for schizotypals and related types (fronto-striatal resonance that leads to psychosis, which is why AP had the reaction he did) including all these new ‘hemp’ cannabinoids (which I tried all of and did have some very deep revelations with, especially 200+ mg hhc, that set me on a new and better path in life… but also exposed me to truly incredible darkness… only did them to manage very bad physical pain from gastritis, do not recommend as they are showed clear signs of liver toxicity and of course so many other health reasons)
Pure psychedelics though… that is a very complex topic and I don’t think those are either a thing to do lightly or to write off. MKULTRA uses them for a reason, they allow the maximum of associative horizon and a return one to a child-like state where the self can be re-constructed (for good or ill) and problems solved by truly novel means (ah but there is much more in that ‘space’ and there be many dragons).
Thing is though- we can choose to have a ‘new’, learning mind that sees the world as it is instead of the symbolic value of the thing. One can choose to look at raw reality (at least what is going into consciousness, not the true outside) just as they did as a child, they just have to pay the price of the pain that always comes with it, instead of the sugar high of the dreams everyone chooses to live in (but maybe the world is the greatest dream of all, it isn’t clear).
It’s a choice and you have pure free will as a mysteriously self aware consciousness trapped in a structure of automatized cognitions that can be bent to SERVE you and not fight you, as your little helpers, at least if you do the things necessary to give the mind an appropriate nutritional environment and low toxic load. We don’t have to ossify and become so damn set in everything like all the normies that rush to never learn a single meaningful (and thus painful) thing the rest of their lives the exact second that such a situation is theoretically possible. The left and right hemispheres can work together, and all the other parts can get what they need, save the demons that must be exorcised.
Anyway, I don’t think many people should look into this space but in 6 or 7 months perhaps I’ll take a crack at it and see at least what psilocybin has going on and if there is anything that can be gained in terms of the nature of consciousness, horrific and painful mortification (emotional pain so important, must embrace), or otherwise (no interest in the others- I want to keep my brain cells, thank you. They are friends).
> Thing is though- we can choose to have a ‘new’, learning mind that sees the world as it is instead of the symbolic value of the thing. One can choose to look at raw reality (at least what is going into consciousness, not the true outside) just as they did as a child, they just have to pay the price of the pain that always comes with it, instead of the sugar high of the dreams everyone chooses to live in (but maybe the world is the greatest dream of all, it isn’t clear).
> It’s a choice and you have pure free will as a mysteriously self aware consciousness trapped in a structure of automatized cognitions that can be bent to SERVE you and not fight you, as your little helpers, at least if you do the things necessary to give the mind an appropriate nutritional environment and low toxic load. We don’t have to ossify and become so damn set in everything like all the normies that rush to never learn a single meaningful (and thus painful) thing the rest of their lives the exact second that such a situation is theoretically possible. The left and right hemispheres can work together, and all the other parts can get what they need, save the demons that must be exorcised.
This could well be the ineffable difference that we sense in people who are intellectually and/or artistically honest. The sensation of someone having that deep connection to truth feels like a rawness, like exposed nerve endings.
> I want to keep my brain cells, thank you. They are friends).
I think it’s healthiest to view them the way a good king views his subjects, the way a good dad views his children, or the way a responsible athlete views his muscles. Sort of a mutual service arrangement with a clear hierarchy and a risk of revolution if the leader is a tyrant.
Also, not that it’ll make a dent, but drugs are bad and you shouldn’t try psychedelics.
Heh, you had to try. Good news is I am very self aware and know exactly what having loads of brain cells die feels like. If that’s what happens, I’m not going to keep going and become retarded like some 60s burnout, Im going to just stop and call it a day from that angle. My current understanding is that was from the LSD, which is much much more destructive on the mind whereas the risks from psilocybin are more along the lines of “going fucking crazy” and less so “becoming crazy AND retarded”. My expectation is that psilocybin= serial experiments lain whereas weed is like hyper dimensional aqua teen hunger force (with horror) and lsd is maybe like… actual insanity where you have sex with dolphins like John C Lily.
Sir, I’m trying to keep a nofap streak going here, I’d appreciate if you didn’t tempt me with stories about sea succibi.
Oh Im doing that too now. Interesting how all the evil just started viciously coming out of the woodwork, but all that did was make me understand the stakes and that it isnt just some fun or good thing to do. There’s something else at work, and I won’t be having that.